SIGNS

A friend sent me this........(my responses in bold)

25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. Not true, Phil has the green thumb here not me. And I never smoked since I could never inhale!!

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. These days having sex in a KING size bed is out of the question! Too damn tired to even THINK about that!

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. These days alcohol has REALLY become my best friend again.

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. Um, I'm up most of the night and it isn't cause I'm hunched over a toilet!

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel. Actually the kids run the TV & it's Scooby Doo that we watch!

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. I'm on vacation 365 days a year, aren't I??

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo. Yep, did that ALL the time on the neighbor when we lived at the trailer park! And that was even before we had kids!

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. I think I could Sleep ANYWHERE these days!

16. You take naps. YES I try to!

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one. DATE?? What's a date??

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.

19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit." It's NOT? Hell, I Still LOVE it!! BOONE'S FARM, right Stacie? Melissa??

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again." Yep, sorry to say that this one is true!!

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. Damn Ebay

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar. Well ya!

25. When you find out your friends are pregnant you congratulate
them instead of asking "Oh no, what the hell happened?" Actually now if any of my friends call with that news...it'll be more of a HA HA!! I think we are all pretty much done unless if someone's doctor messed up...then we're all in trouble!!

Bonus:

26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass. Then you Post it on your Blog because you want a bunch of old friends to read it 'cause you know they'll enjoy it & do the same!